Brother
by Ferrum
Summary: Sasarai longed for a brother.


**兄弟**// //Brother  
**Disclaimer:** Not mine. Konami's  
**Pairings:** None, just Sasarai being angsty about Luc.   
**Timeline**: At and after the end of Suikoden III  
**Notes**: Made this for the 57th of 108 Gensui Titles challenge. More of this in my site. *In a need for a betareader cause her English is sucks*  
  
  


"Luc!?" A name was shouted. "What are you doing here??"  
  
That one name was enough to make all the people present in the lobby of Budehuc Castle to turn their heads towards the source of the voice. Viki's face showed panic when he realized everybody was looking at her.  
  
"Eh?? Did I do something wrong??"  
  
Apple then stepped forward towards the female magician's direction, "He's not Luc, Viki. His name is Sasarai, Bishop of Holy Harmonia."  
  
"Uh? I don't understand. How come they so look alike?" Viki said, still confused. "I don't know Luc has a twin brother."  
  
"Unjust!" Dios the shouted, "how could you compare---"  
"Well, he's not---"  
  
Just when Apple and Dios replied Viki's words, Sasarai chuckles came in.  
The first time he was escorted into Budehuc Castle, the first thing happened was someone called him 'Luc'...

  
  
  
**057. 兄弟**// _Brother_  
  
  
_you're the person i hate most in the world  
at the same time,  
you're the only person i empathize with  
... **brother**..._  
  
_It hurts...  
His heart is hurting him...  
... _Brother_... ..._Luc_..._  
  
Holy Kingdom of Harmonia.  
One of the super power nation in the world.  
Crystal Valley.  
One of the most prosperous capital in the continent.  
  
He was the Bishop of Holy Harmonia, one of the most important person in the world.  
Not like he suffered physically or materially. Quite the opposite actually. He had anything that gold could buy. He was well-looked by everybody. He was well-kept like a treasure.  
Or more like a walking safety with treasure inside.  
  
Sounds of shoes greeting crystal floor echoed in the hall. Holding his head up and keeping his expression firm was what he supposed to do. People were also doing what they supposed to do. Priests and soldiers he passed curtsying their heads, greeting him good morning.  
  
"Bishop Sasarai," one saluted him when he stopped in front of a pair of giant doors.  
  
"Open the door, sir Hikusaak had summoned me." Only one sentence he needed to say...  
  
"Yes, sir," and they would obey.  
  
It was dim when he stepped into the room. The only source of light were lines of crystal lit faintly in the hall connected to a giant room.  
  
"My son," a voice called when he reached the space.  
  
"Father Hikusaak," Sasarai hailed back.  
  
It was long one-sided conversation, with Sasarai did all the talking as a perfectionist, he tried not to miss any details on the report...  
About his departure to take back his True Earth Rune...  
About the Flame Champion and the Flame Bringers...  
About the battle between the True Runes...  
About the other True Runes...  
About the Masked Bishop...  
  
Only one that he didn't tell. He didn't tell anything about Luc. All he said was 'Masked Bishop' or 'that Bishop'... he didn't mention anything about a boy named 'Luc' behind that mask. He didn't want it, and he felt he didn't need to do it.  
  
"So do you know the whereabouts of the True Wind Rune now?"  
  
"I'm sorry, father," Sasarai's monotone voice answered Hikusaak's echoing question. "The True Wind Rune was maybe buried in that Ancient Cyndar Ruins along with the Masked Bishop. We don't have time to take it back, because the Ruins crumbled, loosing the True Runes as its pillars."  
  
"I see." The voice commented, accepting the whole the fact. "And the True Fire, True Water, and True Lightning were on those three's hands..."  
  
"Yes, father."  
  
The Circle Rune bearer was silent, as if he was thinking... and yes, few moments after, his voice was heard again, asking for Sasarai's opinion, "do you think the Karayan boy, the Silver Maiden Zexen Knight, and the Captain of the 12th group of our Southern Defense are suitable for bearing the True Runes?"  
  
Sasarai looked at the empty room with a confused yet serious eyes, trying to search the purpose of the question.  
An idea popped in his head... _... What if...? ...What if...?_  
He smiled at the thought, a cruel smile... _... Maybe if..._  
_... No... No..._   
_... Yes... Yes..._  
  
... .... Yes... Sasarai made a satisfied smile as his eyes deepened and his mouth opened preparing to say... 'no'...  
  
"Sasarai?"  
  
Sasarai's eyes widened at the call of his name. He quickly turned his head at the nothingness in the room. "Yes, father. I think Hugo, Chris, and Geddoe will keep the True Runes well..."  
_Fool, what are you thinking about?_ Sasarai cursed himself... _Luc would never come back..._  
  
"I see." The voice said again. "You may go."  
  
But Sasarai didn't go. His body stood still in the darkness of the room.  
  
"My son, do you have anything to ask about?"  
  
Sasarai didn't answer so soon. His eyes was staring at the ground. He was thinking, should he asked him or not. He closed and opened his fists repeatedly, he was nervous. At the end...  
"Father, did you already know who is Masked Bishop at the time he stepped into this temple?"  
  
No reply from the nothingness. Sasarai kept himself not to break through the darkness and met the Circle Rune bearer eye to eye to get the answer. He held his breath.  
  
"Yes, I already know." Hikusaak answered simply. "what about it, son?"  
  
... ... ... "Nothing," Sasarai then bowed his head towards the empty room. "Let me excuse myself, father."  
  
With that the audience was over... and Sasarai walked back to the way he had came before, with the regret in his heart... _why didn't you say 'no'?_  
  
  


One time, Sasarai stopped in front of Budehuc Times. He usually didn't like to read anything unimportant, such as Budehuc Times. But the word 'Luc' printed on it caught his eyes, just when he had put his letter in the Suggestion Box.  
... It was an article of Luc...  
  
_**Who is the mysterious magician Luc?**  
Viki shares her memories  
  
The mysterious magician, Luc, was a member of the Dunan Army as well as the Liberation Army. He was a person of merit, who once led the two armies to victory with his powerful magic. Viki, who knew him at both campaigns, shared her memories: 'Luc was always standing in front of a lithograph. I thought he was lonely and asked him if he wanted to go on a picnic, but he refused and said I should go alone. But later he apologized and said he didn't go because the weather was poor. He's a nice person.' There is a big difference between the Luc we know as a magician and the Luc that Viki once knew._  
  
He smiled. So, Luc had been like that. Luc looked arrogant, but he had been really considerate of other people. Soon his smile faded.  
_A big difference..._  
He realized he didn't know anything about his twin brother.   
  
He had been thinking about taking back his True Earth Rune, of it was possible, and Luc's True Wind. He also couldn't stop thinking about Luc's words...  
  
_...Brother..._  
  
Sasarai read the newspaper all over again.  
_Viki, that young girl..._  
  
There was still couple of hours before dinner. He usually read random books in the library. But this time, Sasarai turned his body and head downstairs for the Teleportation Corner.  
  
  
"Hello."  
  
"Eh, here, here and here," Viki didn't seem to hear Sasarai's call. Her gaze was fixed at the Blinking Mirror, while pointing the tip of her staff at various places on the glass. "Eh, I don't seem to get it."  
  
"Hello," Sasarai repeated.  
  
"Uh~ This is getting annoying."  
  
_It's sure is..._ Sasarai tried to get her attention, "Hello, Viki?"  
  
"Hmmm~~~~" Viki closed her eyes, arms folded. She then turned and saw Sasarai, "ah! I thought I heard something, and it was true!" She said out loud.  
  
"Well," Sasarai couldn't help to be annoyed... _a little_...  
  
"Just about time," She took Sasarai's hands and pulled him closer to her and the Blinking Mirror. "I just can't figure this out. Estella said I could summon monsters if I could point my staff at the right place. I thought it would come in handy if I could use the monsters in battle. You know, like the other magician."  
  
Eyebrows wrinkled, Sasarai looked disbeliefly at Viki, "what?"  
  
"Estella said---"  
  
Sasarai sighed, knowing the source of the problem. "You shouldn't believe anything that Estella said, Viki."  
  
"So we can't---"  
  
"For that, we have Pale Gate Rune, haven't we?" Sasarai said. He ran his fingers to his hair, revealing the sign of the mentioned Rune, embedded in his forehead, hidden behind his brownish hairs.   
  
Viki titled her head, looking at the rune. After looking at it for a while, shoulders down. "So, we can't really summon monsters from Blinking Mirror...?"  
  
"**_No_**," Sasarai repeated "Well, you can always attach into you every time you want to. But Pale Gate Rune is not a rune you can get in the Rune Store, and not every magician can attach him or herself to this rune," Sasarai explained with his usual monotonous voice, "but I'm sure a gate magician like you can handle this rune very well."  
  
"Hmmm~~~" Viki put her fingers onto her chin.  
  
"Is something wrong, Viki?"  
  
"Ah!" Viki suddenly shouted, making Sasarai almost jumped. "You looked like Luc! Luc also had the Pale Gate Rune in his forehead, just like you. You know how you two look very identical to each other?"  
  
_Ah, Luc..._, Sasarai totally had forgotten the reason he came to that place at the first place, "Luc..."  
  
"Not just your faces, but your voices too!!! I remember the day when he said---"  
  
Sasarai half smiled, listening to everything Viki said about his twin brother. Well, it seemed that he didn't need to work hard to know more about Luc...

  
  
The present Sasarai threw his body on a large bed. Tiredness and exhaustation, all went out in a long deep sigh. While his blank gaze was set to the ceiling of his room, his mind went flying to another space and time. Most of them was to the days he spent in Budehuc Castle, a small but lively castle. Days of knowing Luc from the eyes of the people who knew him from the past wars. Mainly Viki.   
Viki was a clueless girl, but she was really observant (without really realizing it). From her seemed-unarranged-words, he could know more about his twin than what he got from Apple or Futch.  
  
Luc, the arrogant little bastard in Toran Liberation War. Show off and selfish. Always complaining when someone asked him for a favor, but at the end giving more than that person had demanded.  
Luc, still an arrogant little bastard in Dunan Unification war. He looked unsympathetic, bout he was really thoughtful, about everything.  
  
Sasarai closed his eyes, his head snuggling to the warm pillow under his head. How he he really liked to know Luc at those times...

  
  
"Hh!!????"  
  
Sasarai woke up, back swiftly straightened into a sitting position. Buds of sweat running through his forehead were the leftovers of the dream he had just a while ago. His mouth was wide open, gasping for air. After his lung caught back the rhythm of breath, he then laughed...  
  
Laughing at the dream he just dreamed, laughing at the nightmare he just had. Mostly, no, all about Luc and himself.  
About the first time they were born,  
the first time they celebrated their birthday together,  
the first time they went to normal school...  
Of course about the things that were never happened before.  
  
His mind unconsciously reconstructed the personalities and memories of the past Luc and realize it into his dream.  
  
... and Sasarai thought that he had gone crazy.  
He laughed again, _by the Runes_, his mind really know how to torture him.   
  
He looked outside and it was already midnight, he somehow could tell.  
It was raining. Heavy rain, but not a storm. The sky was clear, but it was really raining. The moonlight made the drops of rain looked like silver threads falling from the sky.  
  
_Yes_. Sasarai forgot to close the curtains of his room. He descended from the bed, walking towards the window's direction, while trying to remember since when he had fallen asleep.  
  
He stopped right in front of the large sized window, that was clearly had been cleaned carefully just before his arrival.  
  
Behind that window, he saw Luc... so identical...  
He walked closer, and so did Luc.  
Sasarai smiled, and so did Luc.  
Sasarai moved his hands to touch the glass, and so did Luc...  
Their fingers touched at teach other.  
  
Sasarai chuckled, of course it was his reflection.  
  
"It's not you," he said. "The dream did a very good job in deceiving me, you know."  
  
"I saw you there... we were brothers, of course we are, but a normal twin brothers. We fought over the cake mom made... you had been jealous of my present and sulked... we fought and ended up with no dinner, because father was angry... and there's a time when you cried because you didn't behave... and I did... And when... of course, they were all dreams."  
  
Sasarai sighed, leaning his head to the glass, while her fingers refusing to let go from the touch of his reflection.

"You know, how I wish to know you before we met in the battlefield thirteen years ago. How I wish that we hadn't been in the different sides... How I wish to know the truth from the very beginning."  
  
_And how I wish to have a normal life with you... not to be in a life where everyone is doing everything just because they have to,_ not a life where Sasarai was right then.  
  
"You know, Father Hikusaak asked me... if Hugo, Chris, and Geddoe would take care of the True Runes well, and I answered yes."  
  
His lips moved, performing a sadistic smile, thinking about possibilities if he had chosen the other answer.  
The thought of Hikusaak storing other shells of True Runes,  
the thought of Holy Harmonia killing those three True Runes bearer and taking the True Runes from the three,  
the thought of Hikusaak giving the True Runes for three new shelters,  
the thought of having new brothers...  
  
If he had replied 'no', would that really happen?  
If it would, then he was very much regretting his own decision.  
  
"And again, if only Leknaat had never taken you from this place years ago..." Sasarai said again.  
  


"You know, what makes you look like Luc even more!?" Viki had asked once, then laughed at her own answer, "you two never really focus on anything when you're alone thinking. You go like this---" then Viki had made an expression which was really funny... she failed making the face she had mentioned.

  
  
Sasarai smiled, yet he knew what it would look like. He set his gaze at his eyes behind the glass: Luc's identical emerald eyes, beautiful... and blank. He wondered if he looked like that too.  
  
"Luc, how I wish..."  
  
His brother behind the glass only gazed at him sadly.


End file.
